The Swim Home

    When I was coming back home from SAT prep, I saw my dad yawning in the driver’s seat with his slightly wet eyes and felt like crying. Something about me is that I always feel hollowed out, gutted like a fish seeing someone look not just sad, not just disappointed, but defeated. He had a tiring day, and even when I felt some things he did weren’t the best, I see that he is just trying to get through “day in and day out” and I leave him be. 

    Silence hangs in the air as we drive by and I type this, and the earbuds with no music is just an excuse to look busy to avoid smalltalk, and I think to myself, music should cheer me up. So I go to my playlist, but then I feel it again when my dad yawns: what is he hearing when I am going through all the emotions music would allow me to feel as I attempt to ignore those hard-to-bear, weighty ones? My father, driving half an hour to my SAT prep and back, stuck with his thoughts after his tiring day whilst driving home his daughter, who he can only pray is doing well in her prep class, and all he has to hear is our argument from before still ricocheting off the walls of the Honda older than me, because how could he have time to afford a new one when I’m in my prep class because dear God does that class demand money we barely have, and don’t we crave whatever benefits we can manage, and a good grade could act as the hit of dopamine it feels like our brains have stopped producing on this silent car ride home. 


    As I continue typing this, I step into my home and my dad is happy with my mom as they prepare for bed, my older sister is cramming homework as always, my little sister is 7 hours into her “30-minute nap,” and I feel content. I don’t have one big fish guiding me through a lesson like Wallace’s “This is Water” speech, but I learn from the experiences and stories around me, so maybe I can formulate my own way to live my own life conscious. #coquettelanadelrayvinyl
 

“ One Fish

Two Fish

Red Fish

Blue Fish“ 

-       Dr. Seuss

Comments

  1. Hannah DornerSeptember 17, 2023 at 12:32 PM

    I loved the personal anecdote you used. You managed to describe everything with so much detail, it felt like I was there. I also enjoyed the fish simile.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Janav SalujaSeptember 17, 2023 at 12:51 PM

    I like the way you wrote this blog. The use of an anecdote to connect to a idea was very interesting. The way you used the speech "This is Water" contributed to your claim and the style of blog was quite unique.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousSeptember 17, 2023 at 1:20 PM

    Aly Matuza- I love how you mention Tara’s napping, that made me laugh, and your story is so good! Maybe you can be your own fish?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sukruta ChetanSeptember 17, 2023 at 6:58 PM

    Hi Natalie, I noticed you used Foster's writing style with the run-on sentence, It works really well with your story (very well written btw).

    ReplyDelete
  5. TashiSeptember 17, 2023 at 11:19 PM

    The way you mentioned the metaphor of the fish into your writing was really nice! I also noticed now you used a similar tone and structure to “This is Water” but used your personal story! I love the hashtag too.

    ReplyDelete

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